Evaluations
by duchessduchie
Summary: First Tommy and Jude would move in together and then, when a reasonable amount of time passed, they would get married . . . wouldn’t they? A Jommy Fic.
1. Chapter 1

Evaluations Prologue- Fade to Black 

_Everything you are,_

_Fades to black . . ._

Present day- 

Jude could vision tomorrows newspapers headlines "Wedding of the Year", "Only the Best for Rock Star Sister", and "Hey Jude, Next to Marry?" Sadie's and Kwest's wedding was perfect like it should have been, like they deserved. Jude was happy for them, really she was, she just wished that she were the sister married. Not that she wanted to marry Kwest but marrying Tommy would be . . . what she wanted.

Life really was not fair Jude decided while Sadie walked down the aisle. Tommy and Jude were together longer than Sadie and Kwest (due to a few rather nasty breakups) yet they were the ones off on a honeymoon and Tommy and her were driving away from the picture perfect reception. Four years . . . that is how long Tommy and Jude have been together . . . four years.

Three Years Earlier 

Fireworks were bursting in the sky and a woman was standing on a terrace where three years ago, during her unsweet sixteen party, Tommy showed her what it was like to REALLY be kissed. Tonight was a joyous one for Jude for a couple of reasons. The first reason was that her long awaited third album release party was tonight. The album had a few new songs added to the ones she record before the whole G-Major mess and she owed it all to the new man in charge of G-Major Tom Quincy. Little TommyQ took over G-Major about seven months ago after he and she returned from their trip to Asia. Tonight is also the one-year anniversary of the day that she told Tommy "okay, lets do it, all of it!"

One-year was the longest relationship that either one of them have ever had. The relationship was difficult at times but more now than ever she knew that she loves him and wants to be with him forever, officially. Jude thoughts were interrupted by Tommy pushing open the door to the terrace. "I thought I might find you here," said Tommy as he walked to the smiling Jude. "I thought you would too."

"You know if I could I would not have invited any of the press but-"

"It comes with the territory" supplied Jude.

"They say it is your _Nevermind_." Jude just smiled at Tommy and returned to watching the fireworks. Tommy cocked his head to look at her and offered, "A penny for your thoughts?" Jude turned to him and said, "I so happy Tommy, with the album, with life, and especially with you." Tommy leaned in for a soft and tender kiss, slowing braking apart their lips, they leaned into each other, forehead to forehead, and just got caught up in the moment. Jude smirked and backed up while extending her hand and demanded her penny.

Tommy just laughed and reached into breast pocket of his suit instead of his pant pocket and said, "I have something better. You know that I love you, right?" Jude nodded her head in the affirmative as a million thoughts went through her head the loudest one being he is going to propose. As he placed an object in her hand he added "Jude I want you to . . ." As Tommy was finishing his request Jude felt an object be placed in her hand but was unable to see what it was but it felt heavier and larger than a ring. As his hand moved away Jude looked down to her hand and saw a key. 'What the fuck?' was Jude's first thought then her eyes quickly flew from the key to Tommy's face. Tommy noticed the confusion in her eyes and repeated his question; "Will you move in with me?" He looked so unsure . . . so untommy like while Jude was deciding. Jude clutched the key in her hand and threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. As Jude kissed Tommy she thought 'So it wasn't a marriage proposal but it was a step. First they would move in together and then, when a reasonable amount of time passed, they would get married . . . wouldn't they?'

_We fade to black . . ._


	2. Chapter 1There's Us

Chapter 1- There's Us

_Not everything is supposed to come true,  
_

The deafening silence was getting to Tommy. Jude and he have been in the car for seven minuets without either one making any attempt at conversation. Jude was 'busy' starring out the passenger window watching the street lamps go bye. Tommy, well, he split his time between paying attention to his driving and shooting side-glances at Jude. Lately, when the two of them were together, there was this strained silence like something was supposed to be said but wasn't and he had no clue what was supposed to be said. Even when he asked her questions her responses were short and getting shorter each day. A sighing Tommy broke the silence with; "The wedding was nice, wasn't it?" No verbal response came from Jude just her shaking her head yes.

Tommy shook his head and reached to turn on the radio for some company. Then he heard some familiar cords and the words "_I've been sitting in the dirt (for 24 hours)."_ Turing his head toward Jude he tried to engage her in conversation again with "Remember when you wrote this?" Tommy was surprised when she not only responded but also turned to look at him while she replied. "I remember when WE wrote this. You took me to a pier."

"I had to make sure that you didn't run away again."

"That's when I fell for you," Jude added softly. Jude then returned to looking out the passenger-side window but was pulled back into the conversation by Tommy's next comment. "Remember the tabloid spread about us?"

"Ugh, do I ever. My mom was so worried about you!"

"That was your first tabloid spread. How many have you racked up by now?"

"To many but at least I was never the tabloid darling like you!" Teased Jude as the two of them locked eyes. Then Jude added with a laugh, "I was so young back then! I feel so ancient!"

"If you're ancient what does that make me?"

"Prehistoric?" Again more laughter. This is what Tommy missed, the bantering. As their laughter died down Tommy got an idea and at the next stoplight instead of going straight he took a left.

"Tommy, this isn't the way home."

"We're taking a slight detour girl."

As they pulled up to the pier in Tommy's Range Rover Jude was still smiling. Tommy exited the Rover and went to open Jude's door and helped her out. The music was still playing on the radio, this time an old classic love song, Tommy took her in his arms and they danced. "More dancing Tommy? While we were dancing at the wedding you said that completed your quota for the year."

"I think I said for the next three years."

"Why the change of heart?"

"I like holding you in my arms." Tommy pulled her closer and gave her what Jude like to call 'her look.' A few songs later a commercial came on and Tommy thought that it was as best time as any to ask her an important question. "Jude I have been meaning to ask you an important question for a while but the timing never seemed to be good so I guess now is good as any time." As Tommy completed his sentence Jude tensed and looked at Tommy and thought 'he is going to ask me. After four years, finally.' Tommy felt Jude tense and said, "Maybe this is not a good time-"

"No!" screamed Jude. "I mean this is a great time. You were saying?" encouraged Jude not only in her tone of voice but with her eyes. Tommy just gave her a weird look but continued on, "Your feelings are very important to me and I was wondering if you were okay with-"

"YES!"

"But you haven't heard my question yet?"

"My answer is yes."

"Are you sure girl?"

"Very sure" Tommy was still giving her this strange look.

"You are okay with G-Major forcibly taking over Jamie's and Pegan's label?"

"Yes-wait-what did you say?" 

"For the past couple of months the board had been on my case about Jamie's and Pegan's label. Sadie found a way to take away their label but I wanted to make sure you were okay with it first."

"That was your question! Your IMPORTANT question" screamed Jude with arms flailing.

"The board needs my recommendation by Tuesday so I-"

"How . . . I thought . . . stupid . . .me" Jude was unable to put together a coherent sentence because Jude was so mad at Tommy, but more so at herself.

"You're obviously not okay with it so I will tell the board it will be an unwise move." Tommy said trying to pacify Jude. He reached to grab one of her flailing hands and succeeded in doing so. Then Jude looked up at him with this disappointed look on her face and started to say "I thought that you were" but she never completed her sentence. Jude shook her head and pulled away from Tommy. Tommy stepped forward to grab her hand and asked "Jude, what did you think I was going to ask you?" Jude just looked at him and said "I'm not feeling well, I want to go home."

"Jude-"

"Now Tommy" insisted Jude as she walked over to the car and slammed the door hard. 'Okay she was mad' thought Tommy 'but she didn't have to take it out on his car.'

The ride back to their Penthouse and the subsequent elevator ride was not just silent but deathly silent. As Tommy opened their door Jude stormed past him to get ready for bed. Tommy followed Jude to the bedroom and stood in the middle of the room looking out at the view they had of the city.

Sighing he turned around to see an agitated Jude, in the bathroom, taking off her earrings and then start to unzip her dress. However, it looked like the zipper was not budging. Jude felt her hands pushed away by Tommy's as he managed to unzip her dress. Their eyes meet in the large mirror that hung above the bathroom sinks. "Thanks" whispered Jude.

"Your welcome. You looked beautiful tonight." As Tommy was talking he pushed her hair away from her right shoulder and proceeded to kiss her neck. Jude sighed, closed her eyes, and leaned her head back against Tommy's chest and gave herself over to the wonderful sensations that Tommy's kisses always gave her. Then his hand pushed down the straps of her dress, off her shoulders, down her arms, over her hands that were void of any engagement ring. Her eyes snapped open and she stepped away from a very unhappy Tommy and Tommy Jr. Jude told Tommy "I am not in the mood tonight Quincy" and she continued on with her nightly routine for bed.

Sighing again Tommy turned away and went to have a cold shower. He took longer than he normally did getting ready for bed hoping that would give Jude's anger time to fade. Even if she was still 'not in the mood' he could at least cuddle up to that tight little body of hers. That's right people, Tom Quincy was a cuddlier. Believe me, no one was more surprised than Tommy to find that out. He wasn't one with Portia, not even with Angie, and definitely NOT one with Sadie but Jude always brought out another side to him that never ceased to amaze or scare him.

Stepping out of the shower he wrapped a towel around his waste and entered their room to find Jude still awake and lying on her back staring at the ceiling. Dropping the towel on the floor he got into bed and leaned over to kiss Jude but met air. Jude had turned her back on him and told him "I am still not in the mood Quincy." Sighing for what seemed to be the 100th time that night he went to cuddle up next to her only to be told "I don't feel like cuddling either. Please just sleep on your side of the bed."

Tommy was even more confused now. No matter how bad they had fought before he was never sent to his side of the bed, but here he was sighing for the 101 time that evening as he settled in on his cold side of the bed and fell into a troubled sleep.

_There's Us_


	3. Chapter 2 How I feel

Chapter 2- How I feel 

_I know how this all must look,_

While Tommy fell into a troubled sleep Jude was left alone with her thoughts and feelings. Part of Jude knew that it was unfair to Tommy to be mad at him and not tell him why, but the other part of her felt that he should know why she was upset at him. Jude wasn't sure why the marriage thing was getting to her, in the end it was just a piece of paper, but it was getting to her. She looked over to a sleeping Tommy and her frustration limit was reached so she grabbed her pillow and hit him in the face with it. A startled Tommy yelled "What-" only to be interrupted by Jude's pillow hitting him for the second time. On what was going to be the third time he caught the pillow before he was struck. However, Jude did not release her grip on the pillow and was pulled across Tommy's bare chest.

With an extra tug Tommy was able to seize control of the pillow. He tossed the pillow to the floor and the identity of his attacker was reveled. "Jude?" Jude just stared at him and as Tommy started to wake up he said, "What the hell! I was asleep!"

"I wasn't," came Jude's response. Looking over at the clock on his bedside table Tommy saw it was 4:30 in the morning and was still dark out. "Jude, it is 4:30 in the morning. I'm exhausted I want to go back to sleep," moaned Tommy.

"Well I don't!" Tommy licked his lips and Jude felt the his lower body start to 'wake up.' Realizing that she was still on top of Tommy she moved off of him and told him to "Get your mind out of the gutter."

Tommy sat up in bed and looked at Jude who was sitting in the middle of the bed with her legs hugged up to her chest looking lost and sad. Tommy reached his right hand out to touch her but saw her tense as she noticed what he was about to do so he decided not to touch her and instead looked at her waiting for her to tell him what is going on.

"I thought that you were going to propose" whispered Jude. Tommy looked at her confused so Jude continued on with, "Tonight, I thought that was the important question that you were meaning to ask me for a while now."

His face was flooded with understanding and as Tommy started to say "Girl, I –" he stopped because he didn't know what to say to that.

Jude continued talking "Tonight was not the first night that I thought you were going to propose. I thought so three years ago, at the night of my third album release party, when instead you asked me to move in with you."

Tommy was about to say something when Jude shook her head and pressed on. "I was okay with that at first because it was logical that before we would become engaged that we should live together first and it was not like I wasn't already spending every night at your place. And looking back know I realized that I was not ready to get married when I was 19. But I'm 22 now and your nearly 30."

After a slight wince at hearing how old he was Tommy sighed and explained "You don't just get married because you are a certain age."

"No, you get married when you love the other person you are with and you want to spend the rest of your life with them. Also when you can also afford too and not everyone abides by that" declared Jude and she added this "You told me **four years ago** that you wanted all of me with you forever and it is not like we can't afford to get married. So why not?" By the last sentence Jude was yelling at Tommy. Tommy yelled back at her "I don't want to get into this now!"

"Well, you know what Quincy, we are! We need to!" Cried Jude.

"No we don't."

"Do you know that not once, in the past years, have we talked about our long-term future together. Musically, yes, but never personally."

"You know that I want you with me" added Tommy in a soft voice.

"You say that but I . . . I am in the same place with you that I was in three years ago when I moved in. Am I ever going to be something more to you than your girlfriend?

What about children?"

"What about children?" questioned Tommy who was getting panicky now.

"I want kids . . . eventually."

"Jude I don't want to get into this with you when you are like this!" Yelled Tommy.

"Like what?" Demanded an annoyed Jude.

"Acting like a kid!" Jude was confused and angered by what Tommy was saying screamed at him "Now I am a kid. An yet a few minuets ago you were trying to have sex with me!"

"I said you were acting like a kid not you were one" clarified Tommy. 

"Oh, cause that is so much better! Well, you know what Quincy, I think you're the one acting like a kid!"

"How am I acting like a kid, _girl_?" Tommy used girl in the non-affectionate way but in an age-wise way that always ticked-off Jude.

"Your scared! You like how everything is going right now and you don't want to have anything change!" Taking a breath Jude calmed herself down and voiced her worse fear "Do you not see a future for us because you don't love me anymore?"

"Jude, you can question a lot of things but never question our relationship or that I love you" stated Tommy.

"But I am Tommy. I need answers. I need them more than I thought I can't . . . please . . . I can't go on without them." Jude got out of the bed and started to put on clothes.

"Jude stop." Shaking her head Jude told Tommy "I need to get out of here for a while. We . . . we . . . both need to do some thinking."

With that she grabbed the keys on the dresser and ran out of the Penthouse before she could brake into tears and Tommy could stop her.

A pounding of a door woke Jamie up. Opening one eye he noted that it was still somewhat dark out and so he closed his eye again and hoped who ever was at his door would go away. Instead of going away who ever was at his door started banging harder. Jamie wondered '_who would be at his door at . . . what time was it anyway_?' Opening both of his eyes, this time, he looked over at his clock but the numbers were blurry because he didn't have his glasses on. To do that that meant that he would have to free himself from a very attractive blond. Doing that gently so not to wake her up he grabbed his glasses and noted that it was 5:24 in the morning and figured that he might as well go see who was at the door.

Jamie was not in a good mood by the time he was at his front door because his toe was hurting like hell due to it making contact with a table leg. He was so irked that he did not bother to see who was at his door before he pulled it open. What he found upon opening his door his heart broke. There stood, at his front door, a devastated and soaked-to-the-bone Jude Harrison.

Only one person he knew could ever putt that look on Jude's face and that was little Tommy Q. Jude didn't say anything and so Jamie gathered her up into his arms and ushered her into his living room. He sat her down on his couch and grabbed an afghan from the back of it and put it around Jude. Jamie then kneeled down so the two of them were eye-level and her asked her "What did Tommy do now?"

He was surprised to hear his voice so even because he was so furious at Tommy. To be fair to Tommy he hadn't really broken her heart at all in the past four years. Sure Tommy and Jude had fights and one near breakup but none of those put this look on her face. Jamie was surprised that he hadn't seen this face during all those years. No matter how much he disliked (yes, he was down from hate) he knew that Tommy was the only one that could make Jude the happiest, but he also had the power to make her the saddest. Right at this moment with his best friend looking how she was looking he didn't feel like being fair to Tommy.

As much as Jamie wished that he could take away Jude's pain he knew that he could not but what he could do was be there for her. Repeating his question, "Jude, what happened, what did he do?"

"He doesn't want to marry me." Jamie was confused. No confused was an understatement, in all the years he had known Jude she was never into girly things. As far as Jamie was concerned marriage fell into those girly things. The more Jamie thought about it the more out of character it seemed '_unless she was . . . could she be_?' Jamie voiced his concerned with "Are you pregnant?"

"No," came the simple response but it left Jamie with more questions. As he was about to ask her another question he was interrupted by a voice coming from his bedroom door "Jamie?" Jamie looked up to see Laura in the doorway to his room with a confused look on her face. Jude looked between the two seeing that Jamie did not know what to due as he looked back and forth between two women that he cared about so Jude made the decision for him. "I'm sorry guys, I shouldn't have come over. I'll go now."

"No" screamed a surprised Jamie but calmly added "Jude, stay here I need to talk to Laura." Jude continued sitting on the couch as Jamie took Laura further into his bedroom. Jude could hear whispering going on and a few minuets later Jamie came out of his room with some clothes in hand. Jude took the clothes from Jamie and found the clothes to be a pink tracksuit. Looking between the clothes and Jamie she said "I don't think that pink is your color."

"Ha ha," cam Jamie's dryly response but continued with "Uh, your clothes look pretty wet and Laura said that you should get some dry ones on."

"So Laura is keeping clothes here now. Getting serious?"

"I . . . eh . . . I guess so." Not wanting to continue down this line of questioning Jamie reminded Jude were the guest bathroom was and told her to change.

Jude exited the bathroom in dry clothes and returned to the living room. She expected to see Laura there but she was not there just Jamie. "Where's Laura?"

"She went home. She has to be at work in a few hours anyway." Jamie patted the seat next to him on the couch and Jude joined him.

For two hours Jamie listened as Jude explained the whole Tommy issue. He didn't say much just nodded his head and listened intensely. Jamie didn't even make snide comments about Tommy where Jude expected him to he just listened. Now he was looking at a sleeping Jude with her head resting in his lap as he processed all that she said. The phone rang and not wanting it to disturb the sleeping Jude he gently moved her head of his lap and on to the couch and reached for the phone. Jamie looked at the caller ID and it said **Jude-Home**. Since Jude was asleep on his couch the only other person that could be calling from that number was Tom Quincy.

Because Jamie did not immediately answer the phone it kept ringing and Jude woke up. Looking over at Jude Jamie told her "I've got to take this." Jamie left the living room for his bedroom and made sure to close his door. A few minuets later he returned to the living room to be asked by Jude "Who was it?" Jamie looked over at his best friend and told her "No one important. Let's get some food into."

_Like everything I've ever loved is coming down_


	4. Chapter 3 White Lines

**AN:** I am so sorry for not posting sooner. I was out of the country this summer and then I went straight back into school and school has been crazy. Here is chapter 3. After chapter three there is an epilogue and then I am done. I can't believe that. Thank you to all who read this and even more thanks to those who have reviewed. I hope that you enjoy!

Chapter 3- White Lines

_I've got to get some distance between my heart and my head . . ._

When the door slammed shut Tommy just sat on their bed too shocked and numb to react. Then he was hit by grave fear-it was Angie all over again. The argument, the running out with his keys, and he hoped this time it wouldn't end tragically. He quickly threw on clothes, grabbed keys to another car, and ran out the door to search for Jude.

He searched G-Major, the pier, a favorite coffee spot of Jude's open all night long, even Spiederman's and Karma's. No matter how many times he thought that this place had to be where she is at-she wasn't there. It had been a few hours and he was out of mind with worry and guilt. He hadn't even thought of what he was going to say to her when he found her he just wanted to find her. Eventually Tommy ran out of places to search and headed back home hopping she came back to him.

As Tommy entered the Penthouse he called out for Jude but received no response. He threw his coat and keys on the living room coffee table and started wandering through their home. Ultimately he ended up in Jude's home studio/office. She liked to call that room her inspiration room. Tommy never liked Jude calling that particular room her inspiration room. In typical male fashion he told he that title should go to their bedroom. He remembered the first time he told Jude that she just laughed and rolled her eyes. Later that day he demonstrated to her why the title should go to their bedroom. Jude then proceeded to demonstrate to Tommy why the home studio/office should be called the inspiration room. It turned into a game of each one trying to demonstrate why each of the rooms should deserve the title. Tommy smiled at the memories and tried to remember who "won" the last tittle war, but it had been a while . . . a long while . . . and he couldn't remember. Shaking his head in the negative and grimacing Tommy assumed the last time was around the time the bantering stop.

That started Tommy thinking; "God, had it really been months? Why didn't he see the signs? Was he working to much and not notice that they were having problems?" As much as Tommy would have liked to blame his ignorance of the problem on work he knew that was not true. Tommy wasn't ignorant either. He knew that something was wrong but he just ignored it, all the problems, hopping the problems would go away and the two of them could be happy again. "If only he opened his eyes to the problem he could have . . . what could he have done? When he wasn't even sure what he wanted except Jude with him . . . but on what terms?"

Tommy glanced around the room that was so Jude. He saw recording equipment, guitars, mementos from tours, gold records proudly displayed, journals, and then there was the wall of photos. Photos of the various famous people and fans that Jude had met. Photos of family and friends, Sadie, Stuart, Kwest, the Spiederman Mind Explosion, of him, and Jamie. When he saw the photo of Jamie and Jude at her sixteenth birthday party Tommy could have kicked himself. He never checked at Jamie's for Jude. Tommy thought about going over there but decided against it because there was no guarantee that Jamie would let him see her. He reached for the home phone and pushed the speed-dial for Jamie's apartment.

The phone range and range and just as Tommy was about to hang-up Jamie answered. The conversation was short and curt. Jamie confirmed that Jude was there, she was physically okay, but not ready to talk to Tommy. Jamie told him that he would call him later but Tommy wasn't going to hold his breath. After all Jamie was not his biggest fan or even a fan of Tommy's. All Tommy could do was wait and think.

Tommy sat on the couch in Jude's studio for hours staring out into space and every few minuets shaking his head in the negative and sighing. The rumbling of his stomach brought him out of his pensiveness. He headed for the kitchen to grab something to eat. He was stuck with how bright the rest of the Penthouse was with all the blinds open. Jude's studio was pitch-back since Tommy hadn't bothered to raise the blinds. He assumed that it was mid day but he really didn't care.

Coming back from the kitchen he paused in the living room on his way back to Jude's studio. Glancing around the living room his eye attention was captured by the bright red and orange striped coffee table. They -correct that- Jude found it in a little shop near the Empress Hotel in Victoria and Tommy was just present at the time of discovery. Tommy called it an eyesore while Jude defended it saying it had character. He declared that they were not going to be taking that piece of junk home with them. Yet, here it was, in a prominent place in their living room. Tommy even defended it when Kwest questioned its existence. Jude had this way of changing his mind.

Tommy was in Jude's darkened studio when the home phone interrupting his introspective. "Jude?" Answered Tommy but it wasn't. It was Jamie. Jamie told him to "come over in an hour or so."

* * *

As Tommy approached Jamie's door he hoped that Jamie was not there only Jude. He knew that Jamie would have this look on his face saying 'I knew you were going to hurt her.' There is no worse feeling then living up to someone else's poor expectation of you. Tommy lifted his hand to knock and instead of his normal loud confident knock it was a quiet and unsure knock.

Jamie opened the door and nodded Tommy in. In the entrance hall the two stood there sizing each other up. Jamie had his coat in his hand and started putting it on. "She's in the guest room asleep," glancing down at his wristwatch he added, "for the past hour or so. I'm going to meet Laura for dinner-the guestroom is down this hall and two lefts." He paused then added, "I'm trusting you with her." Tommy nodded his head in acknowledgement of the information, cleared his voice, and started to talk. "Andrews – I" Jamie interrupted him with "Don't screw it up. Don't go in there if you don't know what you want."

"I know what I want" responded Tommy.

"Good. I don't want to get in trouble with my Victoria Secret Model girlfriend for being late to dinner so I'm going now." With that he left the apartment and all who were left in the apartment was Tommy and a sleeping Jude.

* * *

Jude's eyes fluttered open to a dark room. She assumed it must be evening and wondered why Jamie let her sleep for so long. As her mind cleared away the cobwebs of sleep the hairs on the back of her neck pricked up. Jude sensed someone watching her. She was curled away from whoever was watching her. She turned over in bed to face her observer but could only make out a vague outline of a person hunched forward in a chair. Jude turned again away from the observer and reached over to the bedside table to turn the lamp on. The room was quickly flooded with a soft dim light. Jude eyes blinked as they adjusted to the flood of light and she turned back to see Tommy sitting in a chair staring directly at her, his eyes soaking her up.

As Jude noted the day's worth of stubble on Tommy she asked, "How did you-." Only have her question answered before she could even complete the question.

"Jamie."

"Where is he?"

"Out to dinner with Laura."

"How long have you been here?"

"A while."

As questions were asked and answers supplied the tension in the room grew. Both sets of eyes were locked on the other. Tommy and Jude were waiting for the other one to say something so they could get to the problem at hand. Jude was determined not to be the one who started because as far as she was concerned she said all that she had to say already. Tommy realized that he was going to have to start.

"I really do love you Jude."

"I know Tommy but that's not the problem."

"I know," said a signing Tommy. "Last night . . . it took me by surprise. I knew that something happened to our relationship. . . well. . . it has been strained for a sometime now. Hasn't it?" Sought Tommy. Jude nodded in the affirmative to Tommy's question. He continued on, " I just didn't realize the extent of the strain until last night. And the reason . . . I had no clue that you felt this way."

"What way?"

"The marriage thing."

"Thing?" Jude questioned Tommy is warring manner.

"That came out wrong. I just wish I would have known sooner so . . ."

"You could have handled it better?" Supplied Jude which caused Tommy to choke back laughter and the shared a smile.

"No, I probably would have handled it just as bad. But it might have given me time to think. Honestly I never thought about us marring. Never." Tommy saw hurt flash through her eyes when he admitted that but he pressed on. "Jude- you know what happened during my first marriage. I cheated on my wife, I fell in love with another woman, only to choose my career over her, and she ultimately died because of me. After all that, marriage left a very sour taste in my mouth."

"So you are going to hold all that against me?" Asked Jude. She tried to hide the hurt but her voice betrayed her. Tommy stood up from his seat and moved to sit next to her on the bed. Jude scooted away from him but his left hand reached out and grabbed her right hand pulling her closer to him. As the two held hands Tommy continued with "You were right last night I was scared. I am scared. I am afraid that if we get married I will make the same mistakes again. I love you too much not to have you in my life."

"What are you saying Tommy?" Asked a hopeful and confused Jude.

Tommy reached out with his right hand to the back of Jude's head guiding it so the their foreheads meet. "I do want to marry you someday, but I have some demons slay first. Can you give me some more time?" Tommy felt Jude shake her head 'yes' while she told him, "for you yes." Then Tommy felt her hands wrap around his neck pulling him closer so that their lips could touch and just before her lips descend upon his he heard her say, "I love you too." That was the moment that he knew everything was going to workout for them.

_Home . . ._


End file.
